Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Hugs

I'm not a really touchy feely person. Never have been, but today I got on this kick about hugs.

It all started yesterday when I went to pick Sunshine up after school. Because we had a snow day and Sunshine was with her Dad for the weekend, by the time I got to see her yesterday it had been almost 5 full days I hadn't seen her. We have this "tradition" when I pick her up that she comes running and jumps into my arms and holds on. It is truly one of my favorite moments. I wish I could some how bottle that feeling when she's just holding on snuggled into me.

Last night was a fairly rough night at our household during bedtime, lots of big tears and yelling. I remained calm but stern and when I finally got Sunshine to lay down next to me she reach over and just held on to me and snuggled into my shoulder and the whole world seemed to slow down for her.

I know there will come a time when this won't happen, and I hope that I can keep the memory of what it feels like in my heart forever.

Work has been pretty tense the last few months and right now I'm in charge of a project that has some pretty monumental tasks to handle in a very short period of time. People are on each others nerves and tense and angry. I feel helpless at times, unsure of how to make it better. Today what I wanted to do was walk around and offer hugs. But you know I would have ended up in HR for sexual harassment.

Its like that new Applebees commercial where the apple tries to get people together and not just on the phone or texting. The human touch is a powerful thing, I've felt it, when someone has just put their hand on my back or grabbed my arm when I needed support, no words could do, just knowing that person was there for me... through touch.. knowing that Sunshine just wants to snuggle up to me, that being near me gives her comfort... this non-touchy feely person just wants to hug my entire team and say we'll get through this together... but alas I can't.. and so I will do what I can to send non-physical hugs.

And this, I think is why one of the things I miss most often about being single is not having someone to spoon with...

Hugs to you all...

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